From Trauma to Triumph: Kalpa Gupta's Journey of Healing and Resilience
Please enjoy this transcript of the Crown Yourself Podcast, with Founder and CEO of Knekxt, Kalpa Gupta [@knekxt.com] and, your host, transformational story coach, Kimberly Spencer (@Kimberly.Spencer)
In this episode of the Crown Yourself podcast, host Kimberly Spencer talks with Kalpa Gupta about integrating past experiences into the future. Kalpa shares her story of overcoming childhood sexual abuse and its profound effects on her life. She emphasizes forgiveness, healing, and the importance of self-reflection, particularly in responding to triggers. Kalpa's insights on personal growth, the somatic experience of emotions, and the power of travel are also discussed. The episode touches on the influence of role models and concludes with Kalpa's daily routines and her vision for her future. She also offers ways to connect with her for further guidance.
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PODCAST TRANSCRIPT:
Kimberly Spencer (00:00:00) - Below. And welcome back to the Crown Yourself podcast. And who do I have? An episode that is just about to stir your soul? If you have ever hesitated to share your story, fearing that there are parts of yourself or parts of your past experiences that are shameful or should be perceived with guilt or should be perceived with shame. Then my guest, Kalpa Gupta, is going to bring it home for you, in this episode where we discuss how to merge your past with the future that you're creating and consciously designing for yourself. Now, I will let you know that on this episode, as a trigger warning, we do talk about childhood sexual abuse, as both Kalpa and I have experienced that, and we talk about it from the perspective of having healed those relationships on what it means to be on the other side of forgiveness. And you may not be there yet if that's something that happened to you, and that's okay. And whatever comes up for you as you listen to this interview, I want you to know that's okay too.
Kimberly Spencer (00:01:17) - I will leave the name and contact info for one of the greatest therapists that I recommend, who was also a guest on this podcast, and she's also worked with me a few times, Doctor Jain and should you need that, that support is there in the resources. Kalpa is the founder and CEO of Knekxt, and prior to launching her business 15 years ago, she helped GE, American Express, Zelle, Early Warning Services, Bristol-Myers Squibb, and Mayo Clinic's increase revenues and profitability through strategy, consulting, and diverse operational roles in product management, marketing analytics, and fraud and risk management. Basically, she's a corporate badass, she started her career in research and consulting with NCAR, a leading think tank in India. But beyond her accomplishments in her career, Kalpa is led by her deep purpose to serve marginalized, abused children and women. And she's also a singer, which is really cool because I tell all my clients like, have a hobby. And it was beautiful seeing CalPERS voice, both in sharing her story and the power that came through with that, and her voice and urge to sing also came through through the course of our work together.
Kimberly Spencer (00:02:37) - And it is beautiful to see her transformation on the other side. She has now spoken at Google and Microsoft and is training amazing, high-achieving women who have experienced either workplace trauma or childhood past trauma to achieve alignment now. And so it is my pleasure to give you Kalpa Gupta. Welcome to the Crown Yourself podcast, where together we build your empire and transform your subconscious stories about what's possible for your business, body, and life. I'm your host, Kimberly Spencer, founder of Crown Yourself. Com. And I'm a master mindset coach, bestselling author, TEDx speaker, known to my clients as a game changer. Each week you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity, and confidence so that you too, can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and reign in your divine purpose. Your sovereignty starts here and your reign is now. How far it is my honor to have you on the Crown Yourself podcast.
Kimberly Spencer (00:03:49) - Welcome.
Kalpa Gupta (00:03:51) - Hi, Kimberly. It's a joy. It's a joy to always. Talk to you.
Kimberly Spencer (00:03:56) - Ah. So let's let's dive in. Because you experienced a lot of trauma as a child. You experienced significant childhood sexual abuse. And this is not something that is, you know, not not public like you. Over the course of our journey together, you started really sharing your story. And can you tell me a bit about what that did for you?
Kalpa Gupta (00:04:21) - Yeah, I mean we were talking about it. So today is also my son's birthday, right? So like I'm just looking back at some of the journey that started in our, in my path to motherhood. And as we were working together, I hadn't I had probably just shared that with my husband at the time and people in my family, close family, and I was in the process of. Like really figuring out why do I want to share? So it wasn't so much about like from a place of shame, blame, or guilt, although I was stuck in there.
Kalpa Gupta (00:04:51) - But like, if I am going to share, what's the purpose? And I think part of it was being a mom. That was the purpose that, you know, we want to so much of trauma that we have, but we are also resilient. You know, we also create our trauma, some of the coping mechanisms that also served me. So through working with you at the time, I think I was able to peel a lot of those layers from a place of like having more compassion for me and going, hey, like, what's the worst that can happen from here? Like as moms when we like. I almost think of us as women who have had trauma in our beautiful ways. We aborted the baby. It's almost like you're birthing a new world in which they can thrive in their next decade, their next, you know, 30 years, their next 60 years. So, yeah, it's been transformative from the place of, uh. My relationships have evolved. Like I'm transported back to a time when I was sitting on the couch.
Kalpa Gupta (00:05:54) - Um, about five years ago my husband and I had postponed some things. And now when I look back, I feel like that constant feeling of, like, hiding. Like I'm not enough that is gone. Or. Or if it comes as I notice quickly, I mean, these patterns are ingrained. But I noticed this and I'm like, what in this moment am I making it about me? So I think that's what's been beautiful. Like, yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:06:21) - Yeah. And I mean, because you had only recently started sharing but you've, you've been married for a while and so your husband never knew for a good part of your, your marriage and now. How was your relationship developed in your own vulnerability and courage to share and to courage, courage to also share so publicly as well?
Kalpa Gupta (00:06:50) - Yeah. You know, it's I'm surprised I've surprised myself, right? Because even as I talk about it, it's almost like we went through so much together. We've known each other for almost 17 years now.
Kalpa Gupta (00:07:01) - Like, yeah, I lose track. Um, and we had, um, I don't know that I had shared with very few people, I shared with a very few people. And in the past when I met him, I made the story about, hey, this is a thing of the past, and he doesn't need to know. Now imagine, like, I want to to transport you back to that person you know, who had a heartbreak in her life, who was talking to people and attracting like, some wrong people. And she shared and then realized, what's the point? Because this person turned out to be a cheater. Like, why do I need to care about this? This thing is a past like, doesn't matter. And these are people that I knew who had abused me in a 90% of the cases. That's what happens. So from there, when I met my husband, we went through an infertility journey together. Like I wasn't able to conceive for a while. So it's going through that process of, you know, even fertility treatments.
Kalpa Gupta (00:07:57) - And like it was just traumatic from the like from both our perspectives. He just would feel like I'm pushing him away right a, both mentally and then physically. And I think, um, I never really sat down to reflect about that until like in the last few years. Right. That like now having shared that with him, you know, like he can see things in a very different context, right? Like there would be times where, you know, like that feeling of, you know, achievement or like that hypervigilance. Suddenly I'm making it about I'm not feeling heard, I'm not loved. I am like all the same stories come up and it gives him a little bit of perspective to just just hold me. Just hold me there, you know? And I think that's such a beautiful place to be, where we can share that intimacy. We can talk about it. And not just him. Like just in general. My family has taken it beautifully.
Kalpa Gupta (00:08:57) - So it's just personally very it feels very supported.
Kimberly Spencer (00:09:01) - Oh, I, I so admire your courage. Uh, because I remember when I first told my mom at 17 about my father and I was like, it was. It was one of the hardest conversations that I've ever had because I was terrified of what the outcome was going to be. But I had to like I had to share it. And. The beauty of what transpired out of that of just, you know, there was a vulnerability in an opening in our family where suddenly this the shame of secrets. Right. And so being able to unlock that shame and let it see the light of day, let us see the light of love and have that healing is so powerful. You. Your journey is so interesting because the experiences you had as a child, you didn't know were correlating initially to certain circumstances and work environments. Can you tell us a little bit about that?
Kalpa Gupta (00:10:03) - Oh, totally. Like I think that's been the you know, I am a researcher also from like, you know, like just just the temperament of what I do.
Kalpa Gupta (00:10:13) - Right.
Kimberly Spencer (00:10:14) - Well, you were in a huge think tank in India, so it's not.
Kalpa Gupta (00:10:17) - In my career, I studied economics. And then I was drawn into many different areas from research to, you know, brand management to consulting and a large career. Part of my career has been product product development. When? There was a point in my life when my son was three and I had taken a huge role, and then I was completely burnt out, and I used to measure my worth with my performance, my title. And as much as I'm internally motivated, that's the context in which we operate in our environments. And I found myself, like, completely burnt out. I quit my job. And, uh, from a trauma perspective, that journey led me to in that moment, also working with a coach at the time. And I realized, like, when you go through so much pain, that's where we find my purpose. And I was actually serving a foster care, a volunteer that serves kids in foster care.
Kalpa Gupta (00:11:16) - And through the volunteering work, I found that adverse childhood experiences, shape us. And I came I went there to actually give something. And I found this whole knowledge around so much of research that was done by CDC and Kaiser Permanente in the late 90s around the adverse childhood experiences, like three, three things like around abuse, neglect, and family dysfunction. And that was later expanded. So there are basically ten criteria, you know, around whether you had sexual abuse, physical abuse, mental abuse. And there's a whole list and you can literally score yourself and find out what patterns you have, right? What scores do you have? Anything more than four is super high risk. However, the thing that I want people to know is. Even with one, if you had any kind of adversity, it's very common. You know, more than two-thirds of people had some challenges. And what's not people don't know is when you have had these experiences, your brain's wiring changes. So the thing that I realized is I was tolerating a lot in my life, like I was tolerating people, like I was making some stories also about them, like, oh, they are mean.
Kalpa Gupta (00:12:30) - They are this way, they are sabotaging. And I'm not saying none of that doesn't happen, but what I'm saying is there was also I was also partly responsible for why I was there. For me, it was, hey, this job provides me security. After many years of being an immigrant, and a mom, it pays me well. I can take care of my family, I can travel, but end of the day, none of it was birthed. My mental peace. It just wasn't. Right. So because what I realize is, you know, as much as externally you put up, then everything comes up on your child. And that's not that's the interest that I found in my journey. That is the common story when I speak to many moms like they didn't know, even among my friends and clients, when you share about how childhood adversity affects your professional journey, that's what gets people to go, what? This is why? Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:13:25) - Yeah. And especially that we'll leave a link in the description to the to the ace.
Kimberly Spencer (00:13:30) - The ace score because um, that, that when you score 4 or 5 you're at severe. It literally says you're at severe risk for anxiety and depression later on in life. And it's if you have a higher score than like a higher than that, it is, you know, severe risk. And so like mine was an eight. So that experience of being able to recognize oh my gosh, it's it's not just me, it's not an identity thing. It's a circumstance thing that shaped how my identity is. It's the chicken or the egg, right, of the circumstances in which you experience shape your identity. And then your identity then shapes your circumstance. So how did you start creating and breaking the pattern to allow for this beautiful transformation, where you're able to have a deep, intimate relationship with your husband, a career that's fulfilling you? I mean, you've spoken now at Google and Microsoft and, you know, being a wonderful mom, being here on a podcast, sharing your story on your son's birthday.
Kalpa Gupta (00:14:37) - Yeah, I don't know. I think somehow I probably kept my inner child alive. And I think part of it is like. I was having this beautiful conversation the other day. Sometimes, people who go through life like toughest moments, are the most joyful because you realize that everything every day is a blessing. Like the fact that you and I can sit right now and have a laptop, like talk across like use technology, like there's just so much going well in our lives and we forget that. Right. So I think a lot of it was also working through with you and several other resources came like in terms of designing my days, like if I'm not filling my tank if I'm not taking control of my mornings, and when I go to bed like the I'm giving everybody from an empty cup, right. So in the past, it used to be a lot about like, oh, wake up and take care. The first thing as a mom you could probably relate to is you wake up and wake up your son even before brushing your own teeth sometimes go can you brush your teeth like okay get them?
Kimberly Spencer (00:15:41) - He just woke me up.
Kalpa Gupta (00:15:42) - Right? So, um, I think part of it has been also like waking up. How can I wake up earlier, you know, how can I just enjoy a cup of tea? Like, how can I just listen to my favorite music? You know, I love singing. Like, how do I fill up those? You know, uh, those times, um, and. I think that has been really transformative personally, like bringing in some structure in my day to provide calm like I am also I am I won't say I was depressed, I'm more anxious, like the future of like, next, what's next? So part of that has been like sitting in meditation in the morning. You know, journaling like these are some like life skills, um, or tools. I would say that that has really supported me. But I think a lot of the things that when we did some of the deeper sessions around, like, you know, linguistic programming, hypnosis, like, oh my God, the quality of conversations that I had with my family of origin and understanding their trauma as I had around the time when I shared my story, my mom opened up and said she was abused and she's in her 60s and she had never told that person.
Kalpa Gupta (00:16:56) - She's been married to my husband for my, not my husband, her husband like my dad right now for almost 40 years, over 40. Right. So, um, and she was she was able to open up. And so I think the, you know, I found you were asking about the process. But I think part of what I'm bringing home here is. It's having that compassion for me that has been the most life-changing and I also get to fill my tank. I also get to share, like I was the oldest while I was operating as the parent in my relationships. And how do I just start to claim that part of me that is also the child right now, you know, and always?
Kimberly Spencer (00:17:43) - And being able to bridge that gap between who, who your future self is and that inner child who had those big dreams, who had those, those, those visions, but who also had experienced some stuff. And in that, in that bridging of the gap, there's a great healing.
Kimberly Spencer (00:18:02) - And I know that as a mom, for me, like when I've, when I've had the privilege of being coached by my children every day. Right, every day, right, of just having those reflections in my face and, and being able to reflect on, okay, how is this me? How is this behavior, and why is that triggering a response within me? What am I ignoring within myself? And being able to allow for that. That transformation of my own internal environment to be able to bring greater peace to my child. And it sounds like what what you've been able to do is recognize those external environmental triggers, like when you quit your job that were exacerbating the problem, even if you weren't quite clear on what the problem was. And so how does one go about recognizing those external environmental triggers without putting on the shame? You know, the blame of, oh, they're that person is just mean, or that person is just a jerk. Ah.
Kalpa Gupta (00:19:09) - I wish everybody could go through.
Kalpa Gupta (00:19:10) - I do believe everyone. Like that's the world I dream of. But the reality is it does take a little bit of courage and sometimes, oftentimes a little bit of a crisis where every coping mechanism that people have developed up until that point stops serving just doesn't work. And they're like, you know what? What more can go wrong? I don't care after this. Like so, or I want a better life. They want one to really desire something better for themselves. Right. And the process from that point can be manifold. You know, people have different paths. But what I'm working with clients and, you know, like our discussion and many other what I do know the first at somewhere it starts with some form of release, whether it's forgiving yourself or just being open to that idea. Right. Mhm. Starting to share with a very few people perhaps which it could be a therapist, a friend you trust, a coach you hire. Right. And usually, I think a combination of those and.
Kalpa Gupta (00:20:14) - The third is that sharing takes a little bit of courage and sharing. From a sharing perspective, it's more around when you realize when you truly forgive yourself and don't judge, I think sharing becomes easier. As for me, it's like, that's the process. Like you, you forgive yourself. You talk to a few people, you figure out, like, is there any charge in that that's remaining? Or as you are going to, you know, share with other people or you hone your ability to be able to fill the space because not everybody is going to respond to the way you want. In my case, when I shared with my mom, like, she's like, but you are a teenager by then, like, couldn't you couldn't have run away or did you? I mean, that was a first, first response. Like she was empathetic, but then she was like, she just blurted out, right? And I'm like, mom, trust me. That thought always came to me.
Kalpa Gupta (00:21:06) - And that was one of the reasons I told myself, right? That's one of the things I used to tell myself that I was at fault. I was to blame. I was the one who, you know, just said, they're right. But that's not true. Like, you also miss some things here. Not from a shame or blame perspective. So I think part of the process is. Yeah, compassion. A core group and then you start sharing.
Kimberly Spencer (00:21:32) - Yeah, I think that's such a key point because that natural question of like and it's our just world bias, which, you know, I know we've talked about many times of like we naturally have this, this bias in our brains. And it's that like young inner child voice, it's like it's not fair. And so when something happens that's so atrocious that you're like, it's not fair. Our, just world bias is trying to rationalize in some way, oh, they must have been able they must have kind of caused it in some way.
Kimberly Spencer (00:22:06) - Even even we do that with ourselves. I mean, I got to the point where when I had to look at my sexual abuse when I was 24, um, and I had to look up the definition of rape to make sure, like, I was like, whoa, oh my gosh, like that. That's actually what happened and why that had bothered me so much, and why that experience had had really bothered me. And I had to look at I had to look up the definition. That's the just world bias taking place. And that's why we hear, like in the news when people say, oh, she must have been wearing, you know, a really short skirt, or she shouldn't have been dressing so promiscuous or she must have been asking for like, like idiotic things, like statements like that. It's not necessarily idiotic. It's just everybody's inner child who wants it to who wants the world to be a fair and just place. And when we hear something that's so opposite of that, we're it's our logical, logical minds are trying to make sense of it.
Kimberly Spencer (00:23:00) - And so I love that you were able to have the compassion for your mother to be able to, like, recognize that that was your own story and the compassion for yourself too. I would love you to walk us through it. What is your process for forgiveness? Because it seems easy to say, oh, forgive yourself, but is that repeating affirmations to yourself? Is that prayer? Is that, um, a feeling? What is your process?
Kalpa Gupta (00:23:26) - Hmm. So for me, the one key question that I periodically ask is if this were to happen to somebody else that I love, either it's my best friend or my son, like, what would I tell them? Like, just look at yourself. Like like I like. That's what triggers started. Help me in that forgiveness. Like my son was 2 or 3 and that's where like I started going, oh my God. Like if something were to happen to him, would I talk to him the way I talk to me? Like like I started becoming open to the idea.
Kalpa Gupta (00:23:59) - So. Whether you are a parent mom, or whether you don't have a child, you must know some child, you know. Um, just think about that child you are. And like, how would you talk to that person if something like this were to happen? Like, I bet you, you're the inner words that you have like, oh, you must have caused it. You are wearing this. You are like you wanted attention. If you feel good, you won't be so cruel. Um, so I think that's the first one. A question like I offer. The other part is like journaling. And for me, it was like wanting. I remember reading a book by Desmond Tutu, like a book of forgiving, like it had so many exercises. One of the things that stood out was carrying, like, try carrying like some pebbles in your hand for someday, some time and like, just carry them around. And how does it feel? And I might be butchering the exact thing, but in spirit, like I literally carry some of that for a while and then he's like, okay, then drop them in the garden, bury that buried.
Kalpa Gupta (00:25:01) - And I was like, wow. Yeah, like this thing happened in the past. I am not saying that this was fair or you deserved it or that person. I'm not absolving the other person of their, share of in in creating that. What I'm saying is since then, if you're alive. You are alive. And if you are listening. There's something going right in your life. And you have, you can always powerfully make that shift to go, what do I want my next phase of life to be? How long is it enough for me to just? Just stay stuck in that person like they did it. Yes, they did it. But now look at what you are doing to yourself. So those are the two things that I would offer from a forgiveness perspective. Um, and journaling, like venting out like you don't have to write a letter to send it to them, but like, write it. In my case, I ended up finally having a lot of conversations, whether it was the my abusers or also in some workplace cases, some conversations that I was carrying a lot of charge and, and, I feel free like I literally right now I have no yeah.
Kalpa Gupta (00:26:20) - It doesn't hold me. I claimed my power from that sense. So I from forgiveness. That's the process.
Kimberly Spencer (00:26:28) - And it takes. I mean, I am in awe of your courage because to have conversations with those who've hurt you is. Divine like it truly is. Like there's that statement that, um, to err is, is to be human, but to forgive. It's divine. And that act of of forgiveness and cleansing yourself so that it's a choice to no longer hold that, and carry it around with you to let that define your future. And. I'd love to know because when people start sharing their stories. Then sometimes there's the identification with that being their story, and thus because they're sharing their stories, that they're carrying that around with them, whether that's going on podcast interviews or giving Ted talks or whatnot. So how do you de-identify with a story of your past to a space in which you recognize that it happened? It's a place of acceptance, but it's not an attachment.
Kalpa Gupta (00:27:34) - A great question, Kim, and I'm in awe of you too.
Kalpa Gupta (00:27:37) - Like for your bravery. Like just the way you are supporting people and that it's an identity. I think that the one thing I would offer is the growth mindset about you, about your own identity. So for me, I didn't have the label, so I worked in corporate America, but I didn't have the label. You know, those that vocabulary of gaslighting or, you know, like toxicity at the time or like racism, but like, yes, I knew. But then a lot of a lot of things have evolved in the last four years. So it was like when those definitions came and I was like, oh, wow. Like that's what I was going through. So just separating. Okay. But then this is, this is systemic. And like separating that from a personal perspective, it was like, oh my God. Like. I didn't have the survivor identity. I literally didn't, and. It. It's almost like when you have a disease or some, you know, you go to a doctor, they diagnose and you're like, ah, so I have this knee pain and it's because of arthritis.
Kalpa Gupta (00:28:40) - Okay. But you are not your arthritis. You know, you are this person who's having this condition the same way. Sexual abuse survivor. You. Yes. You've survived. But. You don't need to stay stuck in that. It gives you a frame of reference to okay, here are the things that mean for you. You may feel like hypervigilant. You might be operating from always like achievement, like never feeling enough and um, always looking for that, you know, trigger like a threat, like where that tiger isn't even there, but how? Like it's a choice to use that survivor identity or not. For me, I moved very quickly through that. Um, I moved very quickly, partly because I was investing in myself. Like, for me, I was no longer going to tolerate, you know, some parts of me staying secret that was actually holding me back from my power. Because I think the point where I got in my life was like this. Like I was always a good student, like.
Kalpa Gupta (00:29:42) - And part of whether, you know, that's the identity we make about ourselves, right? And at one point, my identity, like what I was thinking I was, wasn't matching with the internal reality of how I was feeling. And that needed to shift. So, um, separating yourself from your identity, it's almost like a different hat that we have, like, I am, I'm a mom. I'm an immigrant. Here's my business. Here is I'm a friend. But there is a core reality of who I am. I am loving, I am powerful, I'm compassionate and courageous, and no matter what my circumstances are, I can. People can still feel my love, you know?
Kimberly Spencer (00:30:26) - And I love that in the words and how you define yourself of the the, the superior I, the highest self I. In a way it's. Present terms. It's not like you. You're loved. It's like, no, it's not in the past. It's like you're loving, you're compassionate, you're powerful.
Kimberly Spencer (00:30:46) - And those words bring a presence to the reality of who is you. That's beyond the circumstances of experience. And I think I would encourage everyone to listen to the words and how you're defining your present reality. Is it based on circumstance or is it is it in the moment as to how you are being? Because, you know, I operate from the be do have a model of just like it's who you are that creates what you do, that then creates what you have. And so many of us work backward and when we work it backward, we think, oh, I have to be loved. In order to be loving. I have to be powerful and have all these accolades in order to, you know, feel powerful. No, no, no, the power comes from within. The love comes from within. It's who you are that exudes out of you. And that's what you just are, a walking testimony for that. I mean, I love every time I see your face scalp, but like, you were always just.
Kimberly Spencer (00:31:48) - This really, no matter what the circumstances are, you have this depth of love and care that I do believe. Really? You know, similar to what you said earlier, comes because you've experienced the opposite. When you've experienced the flip side of the coin of the hardships and the challenges and the abuse, you can see how life is precious.
Kalpa Gupta (00:32:11) - Oh, totally. Right. Like and you reminded me it's the affirmations. It's a lot of our life has actually been about like just experiencing adversity, making some meaning out of it, and then repeating those over and over again. So to deconditioned from that, like it's those affirmations like from who you are, like me, and then what actions you take. And that creates a reality, what you have. So I love you for highlighting that. Absolutely. I mean, I have just all around my desk that people can see right now, but yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:32:47) - How did you have to decondition yourself from the workplace, from, um, and rebuild yourself as an entrepreneur?
Kalpa Gupta (00:32:55) - Oh, I think I remember that conversation we had, like, which is like, um, hey, like, can you detach yourself from your identity of, like, who you are from your business, from everything? And I was like, Holy shit.
Kalpa Gupta (00:33:07) - Yeah, right. And I think that's just been one of my most powerful, like, memories from working with you like, that identity. And, um, and I think that's become like, in, in some ways I tie that back to the growth mindset because one of my values is also naturally very curious. I am so I am testing my life continually like. Do you know what are my core beliefs about me? I was born and raised in a rural mining town in India. Like I didn't speak the languages I do like. English was not the first language I studied. I didn't speak until I was 16, but there were a lot of stories that I carried that I was not good at communicating or I was not good enough. My messages don't land, and that's the energy with which I was actually operating for a long time. And that's no longer the case because the evidence is so much against that. And I'm also a statistician from, you know, like the economy. I studied economics and mathematics and all of that.
Kalpa Gupta (00:34:10) - So I look at also from a process wisely, okay, what am I making about this situation right now? That is not true. So an identity is the same. Right. The more particularly for self-development junkies like you know, where can I test, where can I grow. And I think um, that's the most beautiful part here. Yeah. Um.
Kimberly Spencer (00:34:31) - I love, uh, Brenda Burchard. Put it. I forgot the exact word he used, but he said first, I think it was personal insecurities versus market realities. Like. And I love that. It's it's not that you said that you led with necessary faith. You led with data and with proof and looking at the circumstances of, you know, what you've been able to create and do and how you've been able to communicate in the results, the outcomes, not necessarily achievements, but like, I mean, some definite achievements and some just if we were to categorize them as just like outcomes, like the outcomes of what you've been able to create with your life and with your business and, and it's it's phenomenal because you have that data and you have that proof.
Kimberly Spencer (00:35:17) - I mean, how long you spoke at Google and Microsoft like, and you're, you're speaking around the world now. And so that that ability to say like it's not necessarily faith, it's like look at the actual data from a statistical standpoint and see what is what is the data showing.
Kalpa Gupta (00:35:37) - Yeah. And you bring up such a good point, Kim. Also for women. How many? Like, I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday from like 20 years, like probably nearly a year ago where we were in Bangalore and she uh, as they are navigating some career transitions and she's like, I was so inspired by your podcast, I saw this and like I am navigating. So it's just fulfilling that people like, if I am experiencing this, there are a lot of women who are perhaps immigrant people of color like they are experiencing, except in reality. So when you reach out to people, right, I'm leading with that data like in service of also, there are so many other people who are feeling the same way.
Kalpa Gupta (00:36:19) - Right. Um, on the identity aspect that you touched upon earlier and then the brands, one of my identities was, oh, I work with all these big brands. I had worked with GE am. I can express cell, you know, BMS like and at some point like I see so many achievers like making this about that job and that oh who am I if I'm not this. And I think a key part of the identity separation is also like you are more than your job and your title, right? So intentionally it's become also like, yes, I, I get thrilled based on the impact it makes, the scale it provides. But also personally, uh, I would say it's still a little bit harder. Hard, right? But I noticed that more and more and go, okay. It's separate. That identity is separate from who I am.
Kimberly Spencer (00:37:14) - How do you separate them?
Kalpa Gupta (00:37:16) - Oh, God. It's almost like, uh, it's almost like in the morning, like waking up, saying some affirmations for me when I enter my office.
Kalpa Gupta (00:37:26) - I have some things here where I look at and I go, oh, this is my work. But I think it gets very entangled. And I'm learning. Even as an entrepreneur, I think the path to entrepreneurship is a path to spirituality. Like it? I completely.
Kimberly Spencer (00:37:39) - Agree.
Kalpa Gupta (00:37:41) - You told me like two years ago and I was like, okay. And I like and I've done like work. Besides working with you, there are just so many other areas that I've invested in, and the things really from a tactical perspective, and I'm a very tactical strategy. I can give you strategy, but the daily tips, it's almost like, okay, when I open my computer, like, what do I see? Right? Do I have something written there? I have notebooks that are lying next to my bed, like, which is probably an affirmation journal about different areas of my life. Like, what am I saying? What am I? And that sets the tone for me in terms of priorities.
Kalpa Gupta (00:38:17) - So for me, it's like my spirituality. Then my relationship with my husband, my relationship with my son, how I'm showing up in my communities, and lastly, my business and vocation. That is what makes me a full, complete, whole person. So being very intentional about okay, the like how I'm setting up time in my calendar. That needs to be reflected in the identity that I feel like that I believe I'm living right. So I think that's the tactical separation from blocking my time. And like affirmations around those areas, like is how I operate. But the going gets tough when some things are not working. You know, when some things are not working. It's just we get into that space. But then again, reminding and I think it's just coaches like you, coaches like other like coaches also have coaches.
Kimberly Spencer (00:39:10) - Just like you too.
Kalpa Gupta (00:39:11) - Coach is like me. Coaches like, you know my personal board of advisors like there are like just so many ways. But finding that accountability is so important because, you know like there's this notion here like.
Kalpa Gupta (00:39:25) - Most, most corporate America like this individual, you know, individuality. And that's more like very, very common to like, um, Western cultures, like you are like self-made. You are resilient. You overcome. But nobody like, you see the success story, but nobody gets there alone. There are like so many failures along the way like, am I perfect in separating my identity? Absolutely not. Even I get tripped up. Right. So but find any kind of accountability, you know, um, for anyone who's actually trying to separate that identity.
Kimberly Spencer (00:39:59) - Yeah. And I think that that's, that's really the concept of of how a queen rolls, because a queen has, from the moment that she's born, a board of advisors, in essence, that have an expectation of her identity as queen, as a baby, like she's like they see that she will one day rule. And that expectation of. Because there is the egoic expectation of Oh, I should have achieved x, y z by x y z.
Kimberly Spencer (00:40:31) - But then there's the higher self-expectation of holding yourself to a higher degree of excellence, um, and standards and integrity than, than maybe you have in the past like that to me is what how I redefine expectation rather than it being, oh I should be here by x, Y, and z and I'm not. Um, versus I see where I want to go. And I have the expectation of myself, and I surround myself with those people who have the same expectation that if I'm not leaning into who I am, like, Spike has the full permission, um, to tell me and, you know, ask the question so that I can reflect on am I being a motherfucking queen bitch like he is? He has full permission to ask that question at any time when I'm in a state of doubting myself or doubting that what I believe are the divine dreams that are placed on our hearts to go for something bigger.
Kalpa Gupta (00:41:31) - Beautiful. And I think it's it's great that you're bringing that up because a lot of our relationships are quality, closest relationships.
Kalpa Gupta (00:41:41) - They are they can either be the supporter or they can be the downer. Right. And I think that's the beauty of working on my relationship with my husband. Like, and when he brings up anything like any criticism, like not seeing that as a criticism because a lot of us do get tripped up. And I remember you earlier on like I would be like, oh, I don't want to share. Right? But now it's almost like died. Didn't think about that. Why did I not think about that and or not getting things stuck but going, okay, here's another perspective. Right? So for me, for me and my husband, it's almost like we are very different people. So he brings and that makes us strong. So when he says something I'm like, and if it hurts, it's like, oh, what part of me doesn't quite believe that it's getting amplified through him right now? Because you know what? If something hurts, there's healing to be done and there is self-doubt there.
Kalpa Gupta (00:42:35) - So that's and that's the role, I think the accountability with, whether it's the partner or people that in your life, they play like if something lands, it's like you get to go there to go through to the other side.
Kimberly Spencer (00:42:46) - Yeah. And so how do you feel about like our current culture where we, like so many people, are very trigger happy, where they experience a lot of triggers and like, what what are you seeing as a common cultural standard, and how can we create greater healing within ourselves rather than, um, creating greater division?
Kalpa Gupta (00:43:08) - So, uh.
Kalpa Gupta (00:43:11) - I have so many thoughts. I think we'll need a separate podcast for that.
Kimberly Spencer (00:43:14) - I think here is your soapbox and go, here's the soapbox, right?
Kalpa Gupta (00:43:19) - Um, I think the trigger is essentially our inability to actually take a hard look at ourselves. Period. Right. And I used to be that person, right? I was very righteous, like, yes, I'm good at certain things, but I'm also righteous, like, oh, I don't expect any less than this from this person.
Kalpa Gupta (00:43:39) - Or if I and I'm equally hard on myself. So I think. But the lens with which I say trigger is like for me. I'll just share from my perspective. Right. So I was triggered in workplaces like some things were not happening. And then as I was going through my own healing, learning about aces, I remember one of my coaches just saying, hey, I work with people who have experience. And I was like, I don't even know why they are mentioning. I'm like, it's a thing of the past. So I was triggered. I remember going home that night and crying like so badly, like so badly. And that led and this person having to then like check on me and I couldn't call anyone. And they actually sent me a suicide prevention number, like all kinds of resources, because I was like a complete mess. Now, you could say I was triggered if they did the right thing. Or you could look, I, I, I choose to view that if that person hadn't shared in the course of that conversation, that sometimes there's that pattern that exists, I wouldn't be here.
Kalpa Gupta (00:44:43) - It's so when I share with people, it's that lens, you know, like I remember when even when I started sharing, I mean, my mom, the conversation with my mom was like the first, you know, and then externally, I remember I did a talk and one of the persons in that mastermind conversation, as we were having reached out and said, hey, you should talk only at education and other places. And I had a choice point to make at that time, the right choice to make. I remember reaching out to you and a few others and going, God, like, what do I do? Like, am I showing that compassion here? Or am I like, do I retreat here and not share? And I realized the evidence then was again, way more people actually were encouraged. They found hope. I even sign on clients from that conversation. Right? So where do I go? Like yes, people will be triggered, but then if many people are finding resources and are taking the action to actually heal, I would love for that world any day that focuses on like, because then that trigger is only going to keep us here.
Kalpa Gupta (00:45:43) - It's going to cause wars. We just are unwilling to look at our own families and ourselves to create, be that force of grounding where, you know, all the misinformation, mistrust that's getting cause we are just. Pushing the blame on somebody else. And that's not happening anymore in my watch, in my own life, family, and relationships, people that I deal with.
Kimberly Spencer (00:46:07) - Mhm. Yeah, it is. I love, your definition of triggering because I think especially when you can look at that internal trigger, I remember when uh when I was engaged and I put quotes around it because I just didn't tell anyone that I was actually married. Um, but I ran off and I had gotten married and everyone thought I was engaged for, like a year. My aunt had heard me have conversations with my ex, and she said something very harsh at the time, but I'm so grateful for it. And she said I hope you believe in divorce. And I was so triggered. I was deeply triggered. And I felt angry and pissed and sad and like, oh my gosh, that's so self-righteous because I had made my decision and I'd run off.
Kimberly Spencer (00:46:57) - But in reflection, you know, nine months later, the marriage ended. Um, I chose to end it. And that experience, I was like, oh, I'm. I am so grateful to her for being the only one in my life who at that point had the courage to be, like to say it really challenging me because some people were like, well, yeah, sure. Just because they liked our conversations with my ex was always fair. Like so much screaming, so much shouting. Um, very much like not how I am today. And so, and especially not how my relationship was with my husband. I think we've had like ten fights maybe in 11 years. Um, but that experience of just having that trigger, something that hit me so deep, like I remember the moment and I had to really do some deep exploration as to. What? Why? That made me so mad. And when I started to realize, oh, it's because she was seeing what I was choosing not to see, she was seeing what I was choosing to tolerate.
Kimberly Spencer (00:48:00) - And then I saw the reflection in her own life, with her own relationship with her husband, that which wasn't very good. And I said, wow, she has 40 years of being in, in that type of marriage. And I realized that she was a part of my breakthrough, but it came with the ability. And I'm so grateful to you when, um, I'm like, that came with the ability to. Take that cold, hard look in the mirror and say like, oh, okay. How? How am I receiving this information? Why am I why is this information actually really landing? Because I love the words that you've said is like looking at does that thing has charge to it? Does that experience have charged? What? How do you how do you define charge? Like is it a somatic experience? Is it like an emotional like what is the experience of charge so that we can pick up when we experience those triggers that actually are key to our own healing?
Kalpa Gupta (00:49:01) - Yeah, it's a somatic experience.
Kalpa Gupta (00:49:03) - It's a it's an emotion. Like you do feel emotions. It's energy in motion. And your body is typical. So for me, it's like my I'm feeling like choked and suddenly like, you know, like like my chest is like, oh my God. As they like I want to say, but I can't. But did they just say it like, oh my, I'm mad? And then my cheeks are like, like hot. And I'm like, look, my eyes are like, look, if the person is looking at me, I'm like, look like, are you crazy? I'm giving that look right? And, um, and sometimes it can be for many women, sometimes anger more than rather than getting angry. Crying is easy because we are holding because we are conditioned to show socially, to not express anger. For men, the hurt is like anger, they will throw things, they will scream, they will like, it's like righteous. So each also we also has conditioning.
Kalpa Gupta (00:49:53) - And then each individual, family, and person can be conditioned to express in a way. But for me, it's that moment like what is what? What am I feeling in my body? Right? And what is it like from an anger level? Where am I right? So those are the two things that I noticed. So um, from a trigger. Yeah. It's, it's it's like, oh, for me, I used to be that person all the time, like crying mostly. And I won't say it all the time, but usually, the anger was crying was the easily accessible thing to me. And now it's not as much even as after all this sharing. I still get emotional like I have ever which is a superpower for me. And I would say from a novice perspective, it's it's like, who am I talking to fast, right? Or am I suddenly not reading? Like right now I noticed I was talking too fast. I am so passionate. So I just took a little bit of a deep breath and I'm like, it's an amazing thing right now.
Kalpa Gupta (00:50:55) - Yeah. So that is exactly what your triggers feel like.
Kimberly Spencer (00:51:00) - And I think you bring to light help us the idea of sense, of that felt a sense of what is your body trying to communicate to to you. And there was um, I love what you said about anger because I was actually the opposite. Um, it was very I was trained, programmed, and played my own plagiarised programming from an early age. That crying was manipulative and that that was a form of manipulation, so I wasn't I, I would get I would have negative experiences if I showed tears and emotion, but anger, that was I'm an Enneagram eight that that that was easier for me. And that experience of being able to learn what my anger was like, what was I really angry about? When I really got to look back at it and reflected on it, it was I was angry about the circumstances that I was in. I was angry that I felt like I was the only one being like, look, the emperor has no clothes like this.
Kimberly Spencer (00:51:59) - Is this a problem like this, that kid in that story? And I'm saying, you know, being the one who's like, no, my dad, he's he's drunk like he's coming home drunk. And those experiences of being able to share that and that almost righteous anger and a great book that I read called Rage Becomes Her. Help me make friends with my anger again and then recognize it. And it was actually through my acting classes that allowed me to open up my heart and feel and feel deeply and feel the love. And now my kids know that, as they ask it, they're like, are these happy tears? Like, that's happy tears. But just being able to have that depth of love and emotion and, and and crying, not necessarily from the shame or guilt, of repressing things, but from the openness of love that it can give you. Because anger, while it can be negative in the body if it's stored and repressed and rejected and avoided when expressed in a healthy, forward-focused way, it actually is a moment it implementing.
Kimberly Spencer (00:53:06) - I made up a word. It's a motivating emotion on the scale of consciousness that actually can move you from those lower-vibration negative states of shame, guilt, and fear and move you into a place of acceptance, neutrality, and love. But I think it's women when we allow ourselves to unlock that anger and like, what are we really angry about? And not spewing it out on others but being able to reflect. And you, you have just done this so beautifully. Your process of reflection. I know you genuinely take that process on a regular basis, on a daily basis, so that that process of reflection of like what? What is it that is really causing that anger? What do I actually need to give myself permission to be angry about? And then and then allowing that to move you out of the shame and the guilt and into that next space. Yeah.
Kalpa Gupta (00:54:06) - Yeah, I'm just reflecting back to like, God, like there are so many. I was at a breathwork retreat once, and then, um, just even recently, like in a personal development training and like, the emotions, like we are so afraid of sometimes just actually looking underneath that, like, like, what am I making about this moment? That is not true, right? Like, what is it like right now? Am I like so for me, it used to show up in my relationship with my child like it was so easy to get upset at him and then like not actually have the important conversations at work or with my, you know, other relationships.
Kalpa Gupta (00:54:46) - And now that became a cue for me. Oh, if I am becoming mad at my son. What is it that I'm really upset about? Is it that I haven't eaten? I'm hungry.
Kimberly Spencer (00:54:59) - So that can actually be the case, especially as an entrepreneur where you're like, is it? Did I skip lunch again?
Kalpa Gupta (00:55:04) - Let's skip lunch today or did I? Am I lonely, like, am I angry like, you know, am I alone like now? Am I tired right? So or what else? Right. So I think it's just, um, every time there are those triggers out there or somebody sharing their trauma, like I used to be that person where I would share and like others would share and I would be like crying, right? But now I am in this place where I can be the force of grounding it. My it breaks my heart, right? I get emotional, but then I'm also responsible for being that force of grounding where others can share their. Yeah, right. And I think that's been the most transformative part in and fulfilling part when actually we own our emotions, we do the work on ourselves to actually, um, not contribute to more triggers in this world, but actually the more healing in the world.
Kimberly Spencer (00:55:58) - And I know you're doing that both as a business owner and as a mom and now sharing your stories as a mom with your travels, with your son, and a new book that's coming out. Tell us about that. Yes.
Kalpa Gupta (00:56:10) - It's a beautiful multi-author book called Going Places. And, um, it's been so fulfilling for him to write that book. Like my it, I talk a little bit about it's coming up in early October. I was just reviewing all the manuscripts and like all the glorious reviews that we are getting in the meantime, I think the most fulfilling part of it has been reflecting on a trip that my son and I and my husband, we did nearly eight years ago in China. And then tying that back to my first childhood trip with my parents for a month-long bus trip in India, nearly 40 years ago. My dad was like, literally in tears reading that book because that trip meant the world to him. Like in spite of, like, all the childhood, like adversities he himself had from a, you know, the circumstances that he was in.
Kalpa Gupta (00:57:03) - But like, it just gave me a newfound perspective of how resilience flows in my generation. Like it's just from my dad, from my mom. Like they took a month-long bus trip with two of their kids and so many full of strangers in southern, from not eastern India to southern India like 40 years ago. And that money, that cost was almost two months of my dad's salary at the time. It's a small amount, but it was still a big amount relatively for him. It was a simple trip, but I that travel has been the transformative part of my life because I also found safety in travel, exploration and travel, reading and travel. So reflecting back now to go, wow, like, um, like how some of the things we do earlier on, yes, there are all these adversity, but there are also positive experiences, you know, positive childhood experiences. So travel was one of those moments. And I'm at a place in life where actually that's also something I'm looking to combine in the work I do going forward.
Kalpa Gupta (00:58:08) - And just today, um, I'm simply thankful for being able to bring those stories and also writing with a lot of authors, like it's just grown like grown. Me personally.
Kimberly Spencer (00:58:18) - Um, I'm so excited for the book. I'm so excited for it to come out. This. I know this has been a long time coming, so I'm excited to read about your adventures and we will definitely leave a link to the book in the description. We encourage you to get it. Leave a review good and share it with with those other those other people who may like it. I mean, it's shocking to me that like, I think I think the statistics like 30% of Americans still don't have a passport or haven't left their hometown and traveled within a few mile radius. Like it's that to me, travel is one of the best educators. And for expanding possibility and perception understanding different cultures and being more accepting of the diversity of this beautiful world that we live in.
Kalpa Gupta (00:59:08) - Yeah. And Kim, you talked about identity earlier.
Kalpa Gupta (00:59:11) - Travel is the one that actually can support you and make being fluid with your identity. A lot of people travel with privilege and things. But I do know travel transforms you like even the simplest of things. Just going, eating in different cultures, meeting people. And um, this book, uh, one thing I would add is also all the contributions are going to a charitable organizations here that supports foster kids. Um, so that's again, like all the profits. So super proud of our publisher, you know, for also making that happen.
Kimberly Spencer (00:59:43) - That's amazing. That's amazing. Kalpa I have loved our conversation, and I would love to shift gears a little bit and shift into a little rapid fire. Are you ready?
Kalpa Gupta (00:59:53) - Oh, yes. That's my favorite part.
Kimberly Spencer (00:59:56) - I know you've been a long-time listener of the podcast, so I'm like, you know these questions. I think you're like, already prepped and ready to go.
Kalpa Gupta (01:00:03) - No, I almost forgot, honestly, until now. Like, I'm like, I don't remember now that you told me.
Kalpa Gupta (01:00:08) - I remember that there is that section, but I honestly, I have no recollection right now.
Kimberly Spencer (01:00:14) - So who is your favorite female character in a book or a movie and why?
Kalpa Gupta (01:00:19) - So for me, it's really Oprah right now. Um, if you told me to, it would be Michelle Obama and Oprah. Like, I just see them together, like, uh, with Oprah. I think just the way with all her adversity, she's been able to come together, bring the build this empire, like in the entertainment from like a lot of the stories. So she inspires me. Yeah. And Michelle Obama, like you only asked one. But like from a, like being married to a the best orator in our world, you know, times history. Like she's like that book. Like she herself is like I think has so much more influence, like just describing the, the grace. She is the power. She is the, you know, like, challenging this identity of black angry women.
Kalpa Gupta (01:01:08) - Like, you know, when people said that like she took on that and like, like how hurtful it was, but at the same time, like how she's so gracefully like just leaning into, like book after book. Right. And how continues to inspire. It's almost like I am looking up to these women to go, what more is possible in the next decade, 20, 30, 40 years in my life?
Kimberly Spencer (01:01:33) - Exactly. What woman would you want to trade places with just for a day living their body alive or when they were alive, you know, years ago?
Kalpa Gupta (01:01:41) - Oh, Celine Dion.
Kimberly Spencer (01:01:43) - So are.
Kalpa Gupta (01:01:46) - I. I love music, I love the stage. I mean, I think that's where I grew up, like, uh, you know, singing and, like, performing. And so that's a key part of me. I'm again, like in the community here. And we are performing again together. Friday evenings have music nights for me. So, uh, what we performed at Texas Capital earlier this year.
Kalpa Gupta (01:02:05) - So I'm like, yeah, I'm finding that music and performance to be more, uh, in my life. And Celine Dion, I know she's also going through some challenges in her health, but at the same time, just how does one keep all of these things alive? You know, their music, their passion, their joy, and the realities of, you know, the impermanence of our lives?
Kimberly Spencer (01:02:27) - And what a voice.
Kalpa Gupta (01:02:28) - Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (01:02:30) - So what is your morning routine that sets you up for success?
Kalpa Gupta (01:02:34) - Hmm. Waking up a little bit earlier, right before my son wakes up. These days, that's only 15 minutes before he wakes up. Um, but normally, like, it starts with, like, um, meditating on and then a cup of tea with my husband, and then journaling and setting my intention, my planning like intention, affirmation writing that those are. And then, um, I do, um, have exercise routine like baked into it. But the three, the first three that I mentioned, meditation, um, cup of tea with my husband and, uh, journal journaling.
Kalpa Gupta (01:03:11) - Right. Um, that is consistent.
Kimberly Spencer (01:03:14) - And what is your evening routine to set you up for success?
Kalpa Gupta (01:03:17) - Sleep on time. Go early. What is on?
Kimberly Spencer (01:03:20) - Time.
Kalpa Gupta (01:03:21) - Mean? Well, on time means mostly we are done with dinner. Nine 930. My phone is off, usually by 930. Like I'm not engaging much in, you know, beyond that and sleeping somewhere between 10 to 11. There have been some days in the phase of life that I am in where I am like, probably not like sleeping by ten, but normally, by and large, like 80, 90% of the time I'm like, I am out by like ten, 30, 11. Like nobody like I'm not talking and engaging with people for sure.
Kimberly Spencer (01:03:51) - Yeah, yeah.
Kalpa Gupta (01:03:53) - Or or slowly my phone either.
Kimberly Spencer (01:03:56) - Amen. Yeah. The scrolling, the late-night scrolling, suddenly it's like, oh, 45 minutes later.
Kalpa Gupta (01:04:03) - I have an accountability partner right now, um, where we are, like texting at like I'm like 928.
Kalpa Gupta (01:04:09) - She'll text me and if I'm not done by then her goal is like ten. So I'm like, okay, before sleep, hey, your phone's off. So I think because what ends up happening, Kim is like, you go into corporate America. In the past, you didn't have all these continuous communications, and then you became used to the smartphone. And now, even as an entrepreneur, you have all these like 20 different things platforms we are dealing with and sometimes phone like at night. It's almost like you can recreate the same thing if you're not careful. I know this is rapid-fire.
Kimberly Spencer (01:04:40) - Oh, but I completely like I am standing on that soapbox with you as far as like just the, uh, the intensity of the amount of connection that we have. And even though it's not necessarily the depth of connection, it's a perception and illusion of a depth of connection that we think we have with all the platforms and all the devices and all of that. And it it can become super.
Kimberly Spencer (01:05:06) - I mean, these companies have spent trillions of dollars studying human psychology to make their free products, be able to be highly, highly addicting in a way. Oh.
Kalpa Gupta (01:05:18) - Absolutely.
Kimberly Spencer (01:05:19) - So just being able to manage our own addictions is so key. And I love that you have an accountability partner that's like phone off. All right. That's that's that's super supportive to be able to say like nope, phone goes down. Turn it off.
Kalpa Gupta (01:05:35) - You know, it was the first accountability partner my son like during the day like 30 minutes a play. Like I sit down and he's like, mommy, you're late. And then the mom. You're late. You're not. You're not on time. You can't pick up the phone. You can't. So it's like our little ones teach us in so many different ways. Like the same things. Um.
Kimberly Spencer (01:05:56) - Do you define it to be your kingdom or your queendom?
Kalpa Gupta (01:06:00) - Oh my kingdom. Queendom is a space where only love compassion and connection and abundance thrive.
Kalpa Gupta (01:06:11) - Like, like literally a place of giving from a place of like pure, pure, pure like, um, potentiality.
Kalpa Gupta (01:06:20) - Um.
Kimberly Spencer (01:06:21) - And lastly, how do you crown yourself?
Kalpa Gupta (01:06:23) - Listening to music? Reading books?
Kimberly Spencer (01:06:26) - How do we find you? How do we work with you and connect in all the places?
Kalpa Gupta (01:06:33) - Sure. So my website is the company name Knekxt. So that's knekxt.com. Um, we'll drop the link in the chat. And then also my folks can find me on my LinkedIn which is I go, my full name is Kalpa Gupta. So um, they will they can find me that way. And then, um, I'm also active on TikTok with the knekxt.com name so books can follow me. And from a working perspective, um, I usually work with 6 to 8 women in one-on-one coaching. The spots are usually limited because I like to have like 3 to 3 months to 12 months, you know, long-term relationships where we can work through some patterns. So those are the ways, um, they can work with me and they can find, um, apply on my website, um, to for a complimentary consult.
Kalpa Gupta (01:07:22) - And we go from there. Yeah. And then, uh, for engaging me for, you know, public speaking. All the information is there on the website. They can, you know, find me, um.
Kimberly Spencer (01:07:33) - Amazing. And for someone who went from not being sure of their communication, you certainly have blossomed and done some such extraordinary work in this world with not just the high achievers, but unlocking the truth behind the achievements. And I so admire what you're doing in this world and what you're creating. So with that, as always, my fellow sovereigns, own your throne. Mind your business because your reign is now. Thank you so much for tuning in today.
Kimberly Spencer (01:08:06) - If what you heard resonated with you, be sure to subscribe and start creating a bigger impact now by sharing this with a friend. Just by doing that one simple act of kindness, you are creating a royal ripple to support more people in their sovereignty. And if you're not already following on social media, connect with me everywhere at Crown Yourself Now for more inspiration.
Kimberly Spencer (01:08:26) - I am so excited to connect with you in the next episode, and in the meantime, go out there and create a body, business, and life that rules because today you crown yourself.
The Crown Yourself Podcast is a fast-growing self-improvement podcast, ranked in the top #200 personal-development podcasts in two countries, so far, out of 4.5 million podcasts. Each week, you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity and confidence, so that you too can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and reign in your divine purpose. To listen any of the past episodes for free, check out this page.