How Do You Get Back in the Swing

Ever dropped the ball? Made a mistake? Fucked up?

Of course, you have…you’re human.

And if you haven’t...well then liar, liar pants on fire. 

IT CERTAINLY DOESN’T FEEL FUN TO BE WRONG, TO MAKE A MISTAKE, TO LET SOMEONE DOWN. BUT, THERE IS THIS THING CALLED LIFE...AND SHIT...WELL, IT HAPPENS.

The question is…

What do you do about it after?

How do you make amends, mea culpa, and pick up the balls and start juggling again? 

These past few weeks as I navigated through grief and spearheading my dad’s memorial, I messed up. I dropped the ball. I rescheduled so many things. I fucked up.

And you know what...it’s okay. 

Because one of my deepest values is PERSONAL GROWTH.

IN MY BUSINESS, WE TAKE IT A STEP FURTHER IN OUR CORE VALUES AS GROW OR DIE.

And, frankly, success is a crappy teacher. 

Your mistakes, messes, failures, and fuckups have so many nuggets of freaking GROWTH GOLD if you just choose to look at them through the lens of opportunity.  

It was with that lens that I learned how to decipher what I needed, what my team needed, what our processes needed, what my clients and customers and partners needed, and how to grow as a leader. 

So here’s how to navigate, acclimate, and grow through the process of dropping the ball and picking it back up, as a better player than you were before. Repeat this cycle daily and you will TRANSFORM FASTER than you would have ever imagined. 

Here is my 5-step Process to do so: 

No.1 - Action

The sooner the better. When we mess up, it’s really easy to want to slip into procrastinating on solving the problem. No one likes making that “I fucked up” phone call. But the sooner you make the call, the sooner you can move through to the growth. 

Repair issues with immediacy. 

This can be with ANYONE. 

...To your credit card company, who you forgot to pay last month’s bill. 

...To that friend who you no-showed on.

...To that client, you forgot to email back. 

TAKE THE UNCOMFORTABLE ACTION AND ADDRESS THE SITUATION ASAP. 

No.2 - Apologize Authentically

Was there someone you wronged? Someone you let down? Let them know in your apology how much you care for them. In one of my apologies of this past week, my friend even asked if she could screenshot it so she could send that to someone when she inevitably dropped the ball on something…

It went something like this:

I’ve been playing catch-up all week since my dad’s memorial this past Sunday. So many dropped balls. And I do apologize if you feel like you were one of them.

I value your expertise so much and your willingness to show up and serve. You have the greatest heart of a cheerleader and connector. And I am so grateful for the opportunity to know you. 

Thank you for your understanding and your grace during this time. 

SEE THE PERSON YOU WRONGED IN THEIR BEST LIGHT. LET THEM KNOW WHY YOU VALUE THEM, WHY THEY’RE IMPORTANT TO YOU.

As Maya Angelou said, “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Make them feel REALLY FREAKING SPECIAL, from an authentic place, and honor your part.

No.3 - Assess

Self-awareness comes with multiple layers. And in cases where you’ve dropped the ball, it’s not only you that you need to assess, but the other person or people involved, and also the situation as a whole.

How can YOU make this right?

What can you offer the person you’ve let down? How can you go above and beyond for them? What do you need to DO - beyond words - to make this right.

What needs to change for you INTERNALLY? 

Sometimes you may not be ready for this change. I had to realize that I wasn’t ready to jump back into serving people immediately after my dad died. I knew that, internally, I had to process, release, and let go of some stuff before moving forward. And I knew that there would come a point where my internal would say that it was right for me to rejoin the external world, outside of my cocoon.