Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:00:00) - I find that there are people that have been taught to tear themselves apart at the expense of making other people around them laugh. There is a fine line between being able to take a joke, laugh at yourself, but not tear yourself down. And that comes from knowing your own boundaries as well, because I think certain people can take on a little bit more and others have, you know, a shorter, smaller threshold. And it's just about knowing where you stand as a person and how much you can take and where you say, well, no, that was not acceptable. I'm not going to do that to myself, or I'm not going to accept you to be speaking to me like that. That was not funny, you know? So when your emotions are hurt, to also be able to voice that.
Kimberly Spencer (00:00:51) - Welcome to the Crown Yourself podcast, where together we build your empire and transform your subconscious stories about what's possible for your business, body and life. I'm your host, Kimberly Spencer, founder of Crown Yourself.
Kimberly Spencer (00:01:05) - Com and I'm a master mindset coach, bestselling author, TEDx speaker known to my clients as a game changer. Each week you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity, and confidence so that you too, can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and reign in your divine purpose. Your sovereignty starts here and your reign is now.
Kimberly Spencer (00:01:33) - Helene, I have to ask. Greek mythology. How did you combine Greek mythology into your practice with female embodiment?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:01:44) - Okay, so we use different archetypes when we do the work that we do, and we embody those while we are doing our circles or our retreats and bringing those into the awareness of our attendees as well. So we are directly related to the Greeks being Cypriot. Hence it's within our blood and culture to be able to connect to those ancestors. And therefore, that's where the connection to Greek mythology started. And we brought more of that into our life and into the lives of the circles and retreats that we host.
Kimberly Spencer (00:02:31) - Now, I love the work of Doctor Joseph Campbell, with archetypes and mythology, and the power of what those stories and myths reflect in our own consciousness, and how they show up as lessons about love, about hubris, about all of the things. So what are some common archetypes that you're seeing with women in particular, as they struggle through their challenges?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:03:03) - There's quite a few, starting with the victim. So there's a lot of them that play the victim, which is one of the most disempowering. Archetypes to actually embody and live by, simply because you take away the power from yourself and you hand it over to whoever. You are playing the victim too, and therefore it's one of the most common ones that I find. Women have a really hard time to even be aware that they are embodying. Simply because we have been taught and programs by cultures, religion, society to live in that archetype and function from it, and for that to be assumed as the normal. Therefore, when we bring awareness to that, we are able to see how much power we actually have and that we're able to take the reins of our own life, as you say, Kimberly, and bring back that power into our bodies, into our lives, and to really embody what we've come here to do as women.
Kimberly Spencer (00:04:27) - Yeah. Yeah. I think that thinking of the victim in that archetypal tent, like what I see is that there is a lot of women that because this concept of being a strong, independent woman, he has birthed forth with the rise of feminism. That still is almost a moving away from that victim mindset and that victim mentality. So we're still we still are directing energy into it. Even if we may be strong, even if we may be dependent. So what is it the difference between being weak or vulnerable. And being a victim.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:05:08) - I would say that. Being a victim. Is not having.
Kimberly Spencer (00:05:16) - The.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:05:16) - Awareness. That you are actually playing out that role and embodying that and. Being in your full power and understanding that you can also be vulnerable and show emotions and embrace that beautiful feminine as well as the masculine together, as opposed to needing saving from somebody else. That's exactly where there is a huge difference that I think has been misrepresented through social media, through feminism, through women embodying this strong masculine archetype where in fact.
Kimberly Spencer (00:06:03) - The.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:06:03) - Beauty of women is our beauty, our elegance, our softness, our ability to be able to use our intuition, our emotions, and to connect to that. It's something that God-Given. So we need to use that. You know, we are vessels. We are bringing birth into this life. We am able to birth creation into everything that we do. I'm saying I'm getting goosebumps as I say it.
Kimberly Spencer (00:06:31) - I know, you.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:06:32) - Know, it's it's something that's been given to us that I honestly don't think men have access to in the same way that we do. So the more we embody that as women. And understand that we have power in our emotions. We have power in our bodies, then we are able to hold life by the balls.
Kimberly Spencer (00:06:57) - I love it.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:07:02) - How did you get.
Kimberly Spencer (00:07:02) - Into this journey? Have you always had this like queenly elegance about you? Like you just radiate such a beautiful level of confidence and I can see that it comes from within. Have you always had that or, Where did you start?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:07:21) - To be honest, I thought I had it.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:07:26) - So I went through a phase growing up and in my early 20s or late 20s as well, I think I started to realize I was always confident, okay, let's start with that. I was always confident. I was always very bold. you would notice me with my presence, with, you know, the way that I would speak. But internally I had a very loud inner critic. That's when I started to actually do the work. I realized that I wasn't as embodied and confident and queenly as I thought I was. So that came with a process of recognizing where I was truly at, almost tearing myself apart to recognize, oh, shit, we've got some work to do right here. And everything that you thought you were, you perhaps might not be. And you need to relearn, reprogram yourself and understand, okay? It's not just about how you look. And it's not just about what you say, but it's got to do with how you feel. And if that voice inside of you is criticizing you or second guessing what you're saying, then you need to change that voice.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:08:52) - You need to change that voice, and you need to understand how you're going to be able to do that. What are the steps you're going to be able to take in order to be able to regulate what your mind is telling you, what you actually believe ends. I think that was the moment when I, I was able to break it all down, to rebuild it in order to be able to see and understand. Why I've come on this earth and what I'm actually doing here.
Kimberly Spencer (00:09:24) - And now you're.
Kimberly Spencer (00:09:24) - In such a place of beautiful purpose. And and I mean, my gosh, scrolling your Instagram, it's like, oh, she she empowered and embodied in the empowerment. And there is such a beautiful connection that that you have to your body. What when you were doing the work, how did you do the work to reconnect to this sacred vessel?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:09:49) - So initially my journey started with health and fitness. I was a health and fitness instructor. I've trained to become a PT, I, I lived in Saudi Arabia for six years, and I started my own business as a personal trainer, and I worked with the royal family of Saudi Arabia.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:10:09) - I worked with women over there that were looking to feel empowered, but they would come to me because of a lack of confidence on the exterior. So I initially projected myself in that.
Kimberly Spencer (00:10:24) - Way in the sense that.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:10:26) - The exterior was the way to get to wholeness. Now, when I started to notice where I was at, and I could also see that after they would do my six week incredible program and my nine week boot camps, they would still. They would have huge transformations on their body, but they would still look at themselves in the mirror and say, I still don't like this muffin top here. I still want to change this. I still want to do a little bit of this. I still want to do a little bit of that. Every single criticism that I could still see in them. So with that, I recognize. There needed to be some deeper work. There needs to be some deeper work. So although I was working with the body and that was my vessel to reach a meditative state, I was using my body to silence my mind because there were so many thoughts.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:11:27) - It was so much noise and I needed to work out. I'm a very high energy, high level kind of, woman. So therefore that's the only way that I knew how to release it by releasing that, just like releasing the anger, releasing the stress, releasing whatever needed to just be let you know, let loose in my body. I wasn't aware that there were other ways at the time. And hence, with that came my role of empowering women. So I was not only working with them to change their figures externally, but.
Kimberly Spencer (00:12:06) - We.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:12:06) - Were doing the work to feel more inspired, to feel more empowered, to feel more alive. And that's when I recognized that I was able to use the body in such a way to, yes, help them up to a certain point. But there was another access point within the body where we could feel emotions and recognized. And where were these emotions trapped and how could we release them? And without, you know, just lifting weights, which was very masculine to me at the time, but it was the only way that I knew.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:12:43) - could there perhaps be another way? And that's that's where my own self-exploration began to understand that. The knot in my stomach. It's telling me something. You know the pain that I'm feeling, the knot in my throats, the headaches. They're all signals that we were ignoring. Hence, how do I bring more awareness to them? How do I understand my own body? What is my body connection. Intuition telling me? Then I can also bring to my workshops, to life, to the things that I do.
Kimberly Spencer (00:13:23) - Because the emotions are so powerful, like I too started out in fitness, I started out teaching Pilates. That was my journey. taught it for 13 years and, and realized the, the power of the body, not knowing that I was regulating my nervous system simultaneously, not knowing that I was retraining my body from a very sympathetic, reactive state into being able to actually rest and digest. And yes, those initial cues, because a lot of people come from the perception of, oh, it's just in your thoughts.
Kimberly Spencer (00:13:58) - And I'm like, your subconscious mind runs your body. So the body and the somatic work that that can be done. What is a tool or an activity or an action step that we can actually put into practice so that it's not just going to the gym or getting our emotions out of our own way through exercise, but through a deepening of of our connection to our emotions. Is it just awareness or is there something deeper that we can access?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:14:29) - I definitely believe in the power of dance. Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:14:34) - Yes.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:14:35) - And using these beautiful vessels for movements and being able to feel where we're feeling those trapped emotions and actually use the body in such a way that it's able to bring more power to those spaces, as opposed to feeling disempowered, because a lot of the time, you know, we even notice our body posture. How do we sit? You know, we've got this slight it's a couple of centimeters. It could just be the smallest. And your shoulders are, you know, you're crouching. You're you're leaning in.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:15:08) - And as soon as you just put your shoulders back and open up your chest. Opening up the chest automatically. You feel your heart opening up. So opening up the chest and bringing in more love into this space and increasing your heart rate at the same time through dance, through movements and using this femininity that we have. That's that's everything. So our bodies, through dance and the sensuality and how we can move our bodies, it it's so individual for every woman. And they say there's so many emotions that are trapped in our hips that we carry from past lives, from, you know, sexual interactions that we've had that are directly related to our throat chakras. Right. And in the way that you are able to express yourself in bed, express yourself through dance, you're able to also bring more, more power to your voice so that you're able to express yourself with more authenticity and more alignment, as well as more power.
Kimberly Spencer (00:16:21) - The stored emotion trapped in the hips. I remember I used to say that thank you so much, Celine, for reminding me, because I used to say that consistently and recently just there was a lot of stress that happened in my life the past two years, moving two times, losing three family members and two family friends, having a baby.
Kimberly Spencer (00:16:44) - And so just a few things. This is a and I had forgotten like and I gained some weight around my hips. And since recently I've just started like dancing and enjoying the motion of my hips and enjoying the motion of my femininity. And I've actually taught many of my friends, girlfriends how to walk in heels because I said.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:17:07) - Most women do.
Kimberly Spencer (00:17:08) - It wrong. Because they put, they put. We walk like men in heels. And that's not how our bodies were designed. That's not actually how heels were designed. Even if they weren't designed by a man. They were designed for us to have a gentle sway in our hips. And the more I've come in contact, the more my hips have actually slimmed. But and just allowed the release of the stored emotions that were building up from the past two years of a lot of trauma and stress, and that that experience of the motion of the sacred sacral basin of our bodies and. With that getting more alignment in that space. So I, I mean, as far as my practice for dance, it's just turn on.
Kimberly Spencer (00:17:56) - I have a whole empowerment list of like these are my it's called my becoming a Queen playlist on Spotify. And that's that's my playlist that I jam and I'll just dance through those songs. But do you have a practice or is it just like, hit the play button on Spotify? Like how do you how do you do your dance practice?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:18:16) - Get involved. We need to do one together. Yes, I completely agree. so I made sure, first of all, that I have the space to myself. I think that's really key, because it's a connection to your higher self, and you want to be able to release all emotions that come through that in that moment, because it could be crying, it could be laughter, it could be sexual, you know, sick, you feel sexually aroused. It could be so many, so many aspects of yourself. So I make sure that I have the peace and quiet because I also have two kids as well, so they can go in any time. And that just like disrupts the flow.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:19:01) - So having that I would say is essential. Secondly, finding a playlist that is inspiring, I actually have one that starts off quite slow and then builds up, so it feels like a heartbeat. You know how your heart is increasing with the with the movement. The music is also dancing with you. So there's this beautiful union of music, of sounds, of fluidity in the body. and the other thing that I do, I always keep my journal nearby when I dance to jot down. Downloads ideas that come to me because in that moment you are creating. You are connecting to the divine. You're connecting to your highest self and you get the best ideas. They say in the shower, don't you? Because that's the that's the moment you actually switch off and you know, you're not thinking about thinking. You're not thinking about doing anything. You're unwinding. And in those exact moments where you are dancing and expressing yourself, it's a really good space to get a business idea, to think of a partnership that you can have with, with someone you know, invent something.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:20:15) - There's there's so much more that goes on energetically that we have no idea about on a scientific level. But I think as women, I it's safe to say that we can feel these, these energies a lot and they are accessible and they're definitely accessible through dance.
Kimberly Spencer (00:20:37) - And I think that's that's so beautiful that you break that down in, into having that sacred space. And there's that piece of doing the dancing alone. And then there's also the piece of communal dancing, because tribally, like the two things that have sustained humanity, you go back and you like, it's always storytelling and dancing. They always dance together or they story told together. And there's all these beautiful different variations of dance through all the different types of cultures. But what do we gain when we dance in our community?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:21:15) - What I feel personally, when we dance in a community, there's a common goal. It's like there's a common intention. So it brings so much more power, energy, manifestation to to what you are creating. It's the same like when when people come together to pray.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:21:34) - That's so powerful. In the same way, when, you know, a group of women come together and they dance together, or a community comes together and they dance, there's a there's a common goal. Yes, having fun, enjoying yourself and and releasing and, you know, just enjoying the process. But there's something a lot more spiritual to it. there's a there's an energy field that I feel like everyone's tapping into at the same time. That again, we can't see, but we all can feel. And that is a beautiful union that we don't have enough of as. You know, whether it's your country, your your tribe, your community. I feel like everyone's, become quite, you know, everyone's got their own little communities, which is great. But imagine doing this, like, on an expansive scale, on a huge mass scale of everyone dancing together, everyone praying together, or everyone coming together. There's so much more power to that, to that union.
Kimberly Spencer (00:22:42) - I love the idea of the common intention and it just you just brought to mind so many ideas that I now have.
Kimberly Spencer (00:22:50) - Just don't let anyone know.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:22:52) - What.
Kimberly Spencer (00:22:52) - It look like if our country just chose to dance together and even if we're dancing separately, but dancing at the same time and collectively, because there have been studies done with prayer and meditation, as far as you know, suddenly you get a group of people together meditating. And, there's been a lot of studies with them. Transcendental meditation. And suddenly crime stops for like the time and duration of the meditation, if not longer. And there's no police sirens and it's. It's phenomenal the power of community and the power of our intentions when we come together in in that sacred space. And I would just be curious as to what would happen if we all came together in a sacred movement. How would that unite us as a people when there's so much division?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:23:46) - Yes, especially at these times. Can you imagine if our government is actually focused on these kind of things, like if the mainstream media was focusing on bringing people together in this way, as opposed to depicting how we are divided.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:24:03) - Where we can be as a human race, where we could hang as individuals, what kind of lives we would have, what kind of, you know, environments, what our children are up in. If they were taught in schools, you know, they were taught meditation, they were taught dance. They would talk about thought about connecting to their bodies, how that would change the next generations to come. And what would crime look like then? Yeah, no.
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:30) - I just I mean, you also just brought such a humorous picture of just picturing all the world leaders dancing together.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:24:37) - That's, That would be lovely.
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:39) - That's a that would be lovely. And then that's a lot of old white men dancing.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:24:43) - Well, people. And I thought I would change the vibe completely. I think that's the biggest.
Kimberly Spencer (00:24:55) - Being able to bring humor as well and humor into into our lives, and the joy of laughter, of just being able to have a laugh at ourselves.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:25:05) - Absolutely. I think that that was one of my my biggest lessons in life.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:25:10) - I used to take myself very seriously. And when I realized that I had to be able to learn how to take a joke as well as give a joke. Life changed.
Kimberly Spencer (00:25:26) - The way that I would see the world.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:25:28) - And the way that I would interact with the world was I came from a much more lighthearted space that I was able to just not take life so seriously. It became so much more fun to live. You know, I didn't have to put on this mask. I didn't have to put on this persona any more. I could be silly. I could, you know, there are times that you say the most clever thing that comes out of your mouth and you think, wow, that was quite nice. And some of you said the most stupid thing. And that's okay, because we're human and we have all that. But to also be able to laugh at yourself and say, you know what? That was quite funny. And that's okay. Not feel shame and embarrassment and judgment and criticize yourself and break yourself down because, oh, I didn't appear how I thought I wanted to appear.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:26:11) - So laughter is very, very important. Not taking ourselves too seriously.
Kimberly Spencer (00:26:18) - It's some good medicine, that is for sure. I, I mean, I too struggled with having to being able to take a joke. And I think there's a big difference, though, between can you have a laugh at yourself, at your own humanity? And then are you making fun of yourself at the expense of yourself? yeah. I was researching for my book, and I found that the word sarcasm comes from Greek.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:26:46) - and.
Kimberly Spencer (00:26:46) - It literally means like to cut the flesh.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:26:50) - The flesh is flesh. So therefore. Yeah. Sarcasm. Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:26:56) - And so what are we doing when I just think of all the comedians that struggle with depression and mental health issues, and if you listen to their comedy, a lot of their jokes are self-deprecating. They're filled with sarcasm. Cutting their own flesh. And so. How do we have a laugh at ourselves and have that humanity and that grace for ourselves? Versus let me make fun of myself from a demeaning, berating way.
Kimberly Spencer (00:27:27) - Is that is that a dance that we just do in the moment, or is it programming so that we can have that laugh?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:27:38) - I find that there are people that have been taught to tear themselves apart at the expense of making other people's, other people around them laugh. it's something that I, I find that you need to have a lot of self-respect and know who you are to not do. So for me, it's a no go. It's an absolute no. to to be able to not take myself seriously, have a laugh, make a joke, but to diminish myself in order to make other people feel happy. It sounds like I'm self-sabotaging and I'm people pleasing. Now, if I'm so concerned about people's opinions of me and I'm trying to please them by tearing myself down, that I'm just turning my confidence apart, I'm tearing myself apart, which is definitely not an empowered place to be. So I definitely think there is a fine line between being able to take a joke, laugh at yourself, but not tell yourself down.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:28:44) - And that comes from knowing your own boundaries as well, because I think certain people can take on a little bit more and others have, you know, a shorter, smaller threshold. And it's just about knowing where you stand as a person and how much you can take and where you say, well, no, that was not acceptable. I'm not going to do that to myself, or I'm not going to accept you to be speaking to me like that. That was not funny, you know? So when your emotions are hurt, to also be able to voice that. Yeah, that's.
Kimberly Spencer (00:29:17) - The ability to hold those boundaries. And I think with laughter, I think the humanity and the joy of not to like what I had to reprogram myself to learn how to take a joke and to learn how, not a joke that was crossing the boundary, but a joke that was just like, oh, I really actually did something quite funny and silly and stupid.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:29:37) - And.
Kimberly Spencer (00:29:37) - It's okay. I'm just like, welcome to humanity.
Kimberly Spencer (00:29:42) - but that it was, it was tiny little increments in the beginning of being able to grow that muscle, in essence, to strengthen it, that I could laugh at my imperfections and the, the thing that I love in, in the tarot, the, the opposite of how you conquer the devil is laughter. And it's when you think, oh, all these chains and all these, all these beliefs are like on me, and everything's hard and everything's a struggle, and I have to be all these ways. If you just realize that all of those are self-imposed shackles. And just give yourself a little laugh that, like, I put myself in.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:30:28) - My own prison.
Kimberly Spencer (00:30:29) - Okay, time to liberate myself. That's the beauty of this evolution. So what? What does it mean to really be in your sovereign power?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:30:41) - Oh, that's a really good and big question. Oh, I think there are so many parts to being in your sovereign power. I think it's it's really understanding who you are, first of all, not what you've been taught by your parents, by women around you, by mothers before you, by other business women, how you need to show up in the world.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:31:11) - And that comes with being able to self-reflect and understand that, in fact, if I am not believing. In everything that I have been taught, then what do I believe? And if I don't believe everything that I've been shown. Then who am I without those beliefs? And discovering who you are without all of those strings attached, all of those shackles around you. Takes courage, takes a huge sense of inner strength and confidence to be able to say, to be able to question first of all and to be able to redefine. Everything that serves you and everything that doesn't serve you. And when you understand where you lie within those aspects, you can also show up as your most sovereign, authentic self. Because you're able to say, okay, well, if I have decided that that belief doesn't work for me and what I have been told by X, Y, and Z, or the way that I have been doing everything in my life isn't me, and I'm going to show up in this way then.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:32:45) - I'm bringing an element of healing and bringing an element of Kim into it. And that's where you are personalizing how you want to live this life. You're questioning, of course, in the process, which causes a lot of resistance, which is not easy. It takes courage, but it's the only way that you can actually be free and be able to step in your full sovereign power.
Kimberly Spencer (00:33:11) - Well, I have many questions are so powerful and. One of the greatest fears that I've noticed that people have in questioning is they're so scared to have been wrong about who they have been. And also scared about the guilt that could come from how they were being when they were who they were doing as they thought they should do, or doing as as that belief guided them to do that they no longer are wanting to believe. So is it guilt that we need to deal with first, or is that the fear of being wrong? Or how do we move through that dance?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:34:01) - That's a that is a tough process. That is really a tough process, because we do carry a lot of guilt and shame around who we were.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:34:13) - And it's almost like you require permission from yourself to be able to step into this new version of you. And most of us also are looking for permission from our inner circle, from the people that are around us. And when you've changed and people are not, you know, they don't resonate with you anymore and you are looking for their validation. There's a lot of guilt that comes with that, because you're realizing you're not able to connect with the same people. You're not able to be your old self. People are saying, well, you know what? You've changed. And that comes as a criticism. It doesn't come as you've changed. Well done. Like you've actually outgrown me. So therefore carry on. It comes with criticism and judgment because I think it it creates fear in the people around you that perhaps you're going to leave them, that you are going to grow. And it brings up emotions to the people that are around you that perhaps they don't want to deal with yet as well. So with that being said, the guilt comes from if you've made a decision, if you've made a decision that you want to change because we all change.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:35:34) - And that's something that if I if I'm honest, I'm actually going through right now, I am changing after I've already changed. And I'm thinking, God, how many times can you possibly change your mind? You know, like you are, you know, it's it's a hard process because you're also questioning everything. So you're rediscovering yourself and it takes time. And there's a I think there's a time period that people don't speak about, which is the time period where you used to be and where you're going to be. There's a gap right there that you're figuring it out. And that's where guilt comes in. That's where.
Kimberly Spencer (00:36:12) - Fear of being.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:36:13) - Wrong comes in. And it's in those moments that you need to just keep pushing through even if you don't know where you're going. Just need to keep pushing through to find that new version of you, and be able to release that guilt and let go of the idea that you will be wrong, because will always be wrong. And that's okay. I think being wrong is one of the most scrutinized things that we as humans have done to ourselves.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:36:50) - But in fact, if we were able to embrace. This concept of being wrong, then? We would actually be able to grow so much more, and people would have so much more confidence and courage to be and try whatever it is that they have in their hearts. I remember it was a series that has Spanx. Yes. Let's say she would come home every day and her dad would ask her, how have you failed today? That was the question that they were asked every day at the dinner table. And it was perceived as, you know, you've done something. Well, if you failed, you've done something well, if you're wrong. And therefore in that programming of her is that's where, you know, she was able to try different companies and keep showing up for Spanx when it wasn't doing well. Therefore, she ended up being able to have Spanx and support a business like that because there was that lack of fear. I wouldn't even say lack because I think fear always kicks in at some point, but it's just about reminding yourself that the power that you have is stronger than the fear.
Kimberly Spencer (00:38:03) - So when you're in that space of pushing through. Leaping over that gap, what is it that you focus on?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:38:13) - I would say your intuition in your heart. They are one of our strongest guiding powers. They're always giving you signals of where you need to be going all the time. Now, whether we choose to listen or not, those are two different things, but they're always sending you signs and signals of what truly feels right and aligned. And the more we're able to tap in and actually listen to our intuition and what really feels right for her and for Kimberley for XYZ. Then we're able to keep pushing through that light, because you're always going to have voices telling you different need, but your heart and your intuition know the way.
Kimberly Spencer (00:39:02) - And we have been I mean, here in the Western world, we have been so taught to disassociate and value the power of the mind and logic and conscious reasoning which has its place, but with the heart and with intuition. That is how we're able to quantum leap.
Kimberly Spencer (00:39:20) - That is how we're able to suddenly, oh, I wanted this. And now, a year later, suddenly that's where I am. Like, that's I mean, we quantum leaps recently with with buying our house. And I'm like this, I'm looking around, I'm just in amazement. I'm like, oh my gosh. But it came from listening to our, our, our intuition and also being very clear and specific with what it is that we wanted. Now, for those that have prized logic, for those that have prized being in their head and they're thinking stuff. How do they learn to access the power of intuition through the body?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:40:03) - I definitely think that takes practice. It takes practice because everything is a muscle. Everything is the muscle that you need to keep. Remembering you are. You are constantly remembering and what the mind does. It keeps reminding us to forget. So the heart is always there. And I think every single one of us, deep down knows the answer. Whether we have been so focused on, you know, getting access to the mind and improving our mindset, we truly know that there's something else governing this mind.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:40:43) - So for the people that are really focused on using logic and the mind to function. I really recommend meditation. Meditation is one of those things that I feel like there is enough evidence right now to support those logical thinkers, those mindsets, achievers that. It's one of the most important tools that you can use to quiet the mind, therefore taking you out of the mind and into the body. So I would definitely say meditation. Another way that I have found has really helped my clients has been breathwork as well, because breathwork is active meditation. So therefore you're doing something. So that's for the doers out there, the action takers, the people who think, well, it can't be working. And if I'm not doing anything, so therefore breathing, you're actually it takes a lot of cognitive abilities to continuously breathe. You know, we're talking about an hour session of continuous breath. So therefore your body's reacting to it. But you are consciously breathing. And that really takes you out of your mind and into your body having a transcendental experience.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:42:06) - So if someone you know, I hear many people say I can't meditate, it's really hard for me to meditate. I can't sit still. Breathwork is another great alternative.
Kimberly Spencer (00:42:21) - And you combine breathwork with ipab. Yeah.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:42:29) - Which I am still.
Kimberly Spencer (00:42:30) - Trying to get my husband to do, but he. There is no way. Well, I mean, I'm not going to say ever, because I believe in possibility and.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:42:38) - There is a possibility I hate in the cold. I hate in the cold. I lived in Saudi Arabia because I loved the heat so much. I could sit and sunbathe in 40°C. I absolutely love the heat and if I was to go anywhere near the cold, I would never. I would have said you'd asked me three years ago. I would have said I would never ever again to the ice. You must be.
Kimberly Spencer (00:43:05) - Crazy.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:43:06) - So there is hope. There is absolute hope there. And we combine the ice baths and the breathwork together, simply because breathwork helps regulate your nervous system.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:43:20) - It takes you out of your fight or flight response and back into your parasympathetic nervous system, allowing you to feel that the world is safe, that you are able to overcome anything that comes your way. And we then immerse our clients, our participants, into the ice and.
Kimberly Spencer (00:43:40) - Before or after their. And that's what they call us.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:43:44) - First, we do the breathwork.
Kimberly Spencer (00:43:45) - Okay.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:43:46) - Actually, the way that we've done ice baths has been very, I would say we also bring elements of shamanism into it. So we do a lot of smudging, pulling in our guides and then starting the experience. So we create this portal that we create that when people enter, they just like, you know, weren't in a backyard with grass. But there is this element of love and that is the intention when we create all of our spaces for people to be able to just let go of whoever they are and whatever problems they have outside the door, and then when they come in, they're able to just remember who they are, which we all love.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:44:25) - In essence, at the end of the day, and we all have access to be able to connect to that, but we just forget. So when they come into our spaces, that is the main intention to be able to bring them back to their hearts, to connect to the love within themselves, to the love within the space and the love within. You know, the community, the people there. So we do the breathwork, we get them to lie down. We have incredible music coming through. So you're having your, your, your senses are being stimulated. And in the moment, you know, you're sitting in the grass, you're connecting to Mother Earth. You're hearing the sounds sound healing. You are breathing, you're smelling the sense of sage, and you're able to completely go deep into your subconscious mind and trust the process. Now, when they open their eyes, they then faced with the ice. And one of the things that I say is. Your mind is always going to try and trick you.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:45:30) - So once you enter the ice, your brain is going to say, get the fuck out of here. You are not safe. Like, get out of this ice. That's the first thing that your mind will say to you now. When you are able to override that voice.
Kimberly Spencer (00:45:48) - That is trying to.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:45:49) - Trick you essentially and tell you you're not able to do it, which is the exact same voice that comes up in every single scenario in our lives, says, you're not. You're not good enough. You're not able to. It's too cold. You can't do this. You're not enough. That's the exact same voice that you are overriding. I staying in the ice because when you sat there for three minutes and you are feeling euphoria, you are feeling so elated and you realize, oh shit, I've done it. Then you think, well, who who was that voice? What was that voice actually telling me? Because if I can override that voice in that moment, then in every area of my life, I have access to doing that.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:46:34) - Hence why I absolutely love the ice baths.
Kimberly Spencer (00:46:38) - I love. Believe me, as a marathon runner, like I loved a good ice bath. Really just being able to to go in and even even just a cold bath. Like when I was training for my last marathon, I did my first ten miles in six years and I just immediately knew my body was like being cold. And so I just turned on a cold bath, and I didn't have any ice at the time that I dove in. And it it is cold and it is challenging. And when you override that voice in your head, you will feel so empowered. Yeah. It's like how I felt when I gave natural childbirth. That was just because your brain is like, no, it'll, it'll say the things and suddenly you'll have the programming. But if you can laugh at the cultural programming that says that women shouldn't or aren't or you can't do this, I'm like, well, what did they do before epidurals? If I'm giving birth for a long time before that.
Kimberly Spencer (00:47:51) - So being able to to recognize our innate power that we have to, to grow and to like, surpass that voice. What else do you do to surpass that voice beyond ice baths? Breathwork. Dancing. Is there anything else?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:48:12) - Meditation I sing. I love singing so recently. Yeah. Recently I've gone back into singing. I used to sing up to the age of 17, and then I decided that I was going to be a chartered surveyor, and I went and studied real estate and finance, and very quickly I realised I was not going to stay in the corporate world. I had to create a world where I can function at my best, and therefore the. I took a break of about ten years of not singing, and with time and working on my hips and moving the energy and then recognising, you know, there may be stored emotions in the throat, I found that using the voice and voice activation has been a very powerful tool for me to feel empowered, to be able to get over the idea of stage fright, to be able to to sing and use all the, the, the abilities that we have.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:49:22) - We can all sing. Every single one of us can sing. When people say, I can't sing, that's not true. It's just, it's a it's a muscle that hasn't been practiced. But we all have that ability to be able to sing, and it's one of the most liberating feelings to be able to tap into one of the most liberating ways to express yourself to to just release energy. And also, it's a great way to learn how to say what you're thinking.
Kimberly Spencer (00:49:53) - That is true. It is. It is a powerful healing modality. That was, I was a musical theater nerd. And my I was absolutely in high school, just like. Star of the show. Like loved, loved all musical theater. And it was my way of being able to express things that I did not yet allow myself to feel, and that I did not yet allow myself to process emotionally. But I can process them within the safety of a song or a character. And that was incredibly healing. So I love the fact that you're singing.
Kimberly Spencer (00:50:36) - What's your favorite thing to sing?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:50:38) - I actually do holographic sound healing, so I work with the sound balls as well. And I came to the States. I came to Denver, Colorado to to learn this practice, and it's a combination of sounds that don't make sense. I wouldn't say, you know, there's there were no words to it, but it almost feels like you are singing another language. That's what I feel like when I'm doing it. And that is one of my favorite ways to sing currently. So combining it with the sound balls, the crystal sound balls, and adding my voice to it, it actually sounds like you got different mics in different places because the, the shape of the the ball. So you're getting like A3DI would say five d experience of someone singing for you.
Kimberly Spencer (00:51:32) - So beautiful. I look forward to hearing it one day.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:51:35) - Oh, I would love to have you. I would love to meet you in person. You. Remind me so much of me. Vice versa.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:51:44) - Right?
Kimberly Spencer (00:51:45) - Yes.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:51:46) - Yes.
Kimberly Spencer (00:51:47) - And it's. I think it's so beautiful. When. Two queens can see each other because that just for. Let this further prove the law of oneness. Of how? From across the world that two people can still see each other in their power. And I think that's an incredibly it's one of the reasons why I love podcasting. It's still one of the reasons why I just I have loved this journey of internationally building my business, because it is allowed me to see so many beautiful humans who have so many rich gifts that they're offering their world. And I am so grateful that you didn't get sucked into the corporate black hole, and that you are shining your light now, and it's how you're doing it. How do you. Show up as a mother, fully embodied.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:52:45) - I would say that with my with my children, one of one of the things that I've learned along the way is that I needed to figure out how to do it in my own way once again. And that means.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:53:02) - Being very present with them when I am.
Kimberly Spencer (00:53:05) - With them, but.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:53:05) - Also making sure that I am 100%. A wall to make space for myself. So I say that being selfish is actually one of the best lessons I can teach them. That way, I know that my daughter will make sure that she puts herself first, and that my son, when he sees a queen that needs space for herself and knows how to manage that, he will also be able to give her that and make himself a priority when he needs to, as well as respect other people when they need that. So for me, that has been one of my key lessons in motherhood and navigating being a mom, which I still can't believe I don't. I don't feel like I'm a mom. I feel like I feel like they they don't belong to me. But sometimes I live this life and then they kind of appear and they're like, I'm so grateful to have you as well. It's it's this, this, this belief around that, that I, that I'm a mom.
Kimberly Spencer (00:54:14) - Yeah. There's becoming a mother for me. Was just. It was such an obvious thing for me. Like, I know some women who have chosen not to have children. Like they are very clear on that decision. For me, I was very clear on my decision that I knew motherhood would always be a part of that. And as my, as my one of my best friend had said, she said, you've birthed two boys, so no one's no one's yet usurped your rank.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:54:41) - Well, it's gone, so I don't yet.
Kimberly Spencer (00:54:43) - Have a girl, but I do. I do have two beautiful, amazing boys, and they have been such a blessing. They are my best coaches to see how I can show up and honor myself and use my voice more boldly, because my six year old double Leo Manifester human is like he has no problem with it.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:55:04) - He.
Kimberly Spencer (00:55:07) - Teaches me every day, and then my other one teaches me just a level of such deep, sympathetic compassion in me. And I think that shunning the cultural programming of that parenting is me only on them.
Kimberly Spencer (00:55:23) - I'm like, they parent me right back of of showing me how to be more present, how to be more compassionate, how to be more embodied. My little two year old, he just falls asleep by stroking my arm. And it's the most beautiful experience to just have that. That reminder of softness.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:55:43) - Yeah.
Kimberly Spencer (00:55:45) - Yeah. Well, Helene, I am just. I loved our conversation. I hope to I am so excited to meet you one day. I'm not, I hope I, I am so excited because it is happening when we meet, when maybe the.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:55:57) - Intention is there.
Kimberly Spencer (00:55:58) - The intention is absolutely there. I would love to shift into a little bit of rapid fire. Would you be down for that?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:56:06) - Okay. Yes. Okay.
Kimberly Spencer (00:56:08) - Who is her favorite female character in a book or a movie and why?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:56:13) - I would say it's Mulan.
Kimberly Spencer (00:56:16) - I love you, Lin. Yeah.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:56:19) - She embraces femininity as well as power. All in one.
Kimberly Spencer (00:56:23) - I love it. I think you're the first person to say Mulan in over 200 episodes.
Kimberly Spencer (00:56:28) - And I'm like.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:56:29) - I.
Kimberly Spencer (00:56:29) - Got it.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:56:32) - I think I've been watching a lot of cartoons with my kids. Yeah, yeah. It comes.
Kimberly Spencer (00:56:38) - To mind. I'm like reliving my own childhood of Disney princesses with us. what woman would you want to trade places with, alive or alive in her time? So historical as well. Just for a day to live in her body. See how she thought. Be in her mind. Lead how she leads. Oh.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:56:59) - God. So many coming so have to be one. Okay. Oprah Winfrey? Yes.
Kimberly Spencer (00:57:07) - Yes.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:57:08) - Because I. I love what she stands for. she has done things her way. She's not had it easy. And she's very inspiring with who she is and what she represents.
Kimberly Spencer (00:57:25) - Amazing. What is your morning routine? Oh, my morning routine.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:57:30) - So I make sure that I never, never touch my phone in the mornings. The first thing that I do is I put on my bikini. I lie down, I do my breathwork, my meditation, and then I get into the ice.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:57:50) - So before my brain's awake, I'm already doing the thing that I need to be doing and getting my mind and body into the state that it shouldn't be for the rest of the day.
Kimberly Spencer (00:58:02) - And so I take it that you have an ice bath in your home. Yes. Okay.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:58:07) - So I actually I recently bought a freezer that I had to I had so I've been wanting to it's been on my wish list for so long because obviously there's always the obstacle of having to buy the ice and then set up the ice. So there's always an excuse, but if you have it there, you don't have the excuse anymore. So therefore it's become part of my morning routine.
Kimberly Spencer (00:58:27) - Oh, that is bold. That is bold. What is your evening routine to set you up for such a chilling morning?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:58:37) - So my evening routine I can I can improve on that. I need to add a little bit more sleep. But my evening routine. We have this ritual that we do with Stefan on my husband where when he comes home from work, I make sure that the kids are in bed and my kids go to bed early.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (00:58:57) - Like having routine and structure for them and for me has been vital in order for me to have peace of mind at night and be able to unwind and just to have space to be able to think. And therefore we actually do a lot of talking. We sit and talk about our day and connect to one another. So it's really the time for either journaling. A little bit of meditation and. Relationship. I would say it's beautiful.
Kimberly Spencer (00:59:34) - My husband and I are very similar. We do a lot of talking at night. Once the kids are asleep talking. Sometimes we watch the show, but well, recently I've just been so disenfranchised by anything, even like a cute little funny 30 minute show. That's. I'm like, I've been trying to just talk to him. There's there's so was so much going on and so many. And to children, it's it's the connection time between yourself and your partner is so vital. It's key.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:00:05) - And I think most people forget that a relationship just because it's it's been good.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:00:10) - You can just, you know, you just assume that it's always going to be good, but you can get lost along the way. You lose yourself along the way, let alone your partner. So if you don't make time for that, like you make time for the gym, then that can also end up in in a direction that you, you know, you're no longer there with Japan. So making time for that is key. So I love how you do it as well. Yeah, yeah. What do you define to.
Kimberly Spencer (01:00:37) - Be your your kingdom or your queendom.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:00:40) - My body. My body. That's what I would say.
Kimberly Spencer (01:00:46) - And lastly, how do you crown yourself?
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:00:49) - I always putting me first. I always put me first, always checking in with myself. What it is that I need first. Doing what?
Kimberly Spencer (01:00:59) - I mean, how do we work with you? How do we get in on your retreat in Cyprus? Yeah. You have many amazing things coming up.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:01:09) - So we have our website that's at WW.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:01:12) - It's on Doctor Stefano's dot com that you can find the information on there. And we have so I've got A11 on one sessions as well that you can book. I have a link on my Instagram. So if you follow me on Instagram on I am Helene Alexi. You on this? I know that's a handful.
Kimberly Spencer (01:01:36) - It'll be in the description and it.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:01:37) - Will be in the description. You'll find a link in my bio with all the information there on retreats. Events, one on one sessions.
Kimberly Spencer (01:01:47) - Amazing. Helene, it has been such a pleasure getting to know you, and I look forward to dancing with you someday.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:01:56) - Thank you so much Kimberly, for having me on the show. It's been an absolute pleasure. I'm. I'm honored to have met you, another queen, and to be able to share so much in common from across the world. So thank you so much for having me on. It's been an absolute pleasure chatting with you. Although we don't know each other, we've been talking for an hour and.
Kimberly Spencer (01:02:16) - I know.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:02:17) - It feels like we, you know, we've known each other, that we've had these conversations that have just been so fluid.
Kimberly Spencer (01:02:24) - Amazing. And maybe we have classified, as you.
Helene Alexi Ioannides (01:02:30) - Know.
Kimberly Spencer (01:02:30) - As always, my fellow sovereigns, own your throne. Mind your business, because your reign is now.
Kimberly Spencer (01:02:37) - Thank you so much for tuning in today. If what you heard resonated with you, be sure to subscribe and start creating a bigger impact now by sharing this with a friend. Just by doing that one simple act of kindness, you are creating a royal ripple to support more people in their sovereignty. And if you're not already following on social media, connect with me everywhere at Crown Yourself Now for more inspiration. I am so excited to connect with you in the next episode, and in the meantime, go out there and create a body, business and life that rules because today you crown yourself.
